Showing posts with label perfection. Show all posts
Showing posts with label perfection. Show all posts

Wednesday, August 12, 2015

The Narcissist And Their Pursuit Of Perfectionism

“Bulls Eye Target Shows Excellence And Skill” by Stuart Miles via FreeDigitalPhotos.net 


Perfectionism


It goes with Narcissism like peanut butter goes with jelly.

Narcissus, the hunter in Greek Mythology was known for his handsome looks… when he discovered his beautiful reflection in a pool of water he was so enamored with his image he fell in love with it… hence drowning. From the name Narcissus came the term we know today as Narcissism... defined as a fixation on one's own self.


Narcissists crave positive 
social feedback 


One would think at first glance that narcissists are secure in themselves, that they have a healthy self esteem but in reality they are quite insecure and feel best when receiving positive feedback from others because the voice of their critical narcissistic parent since childhood is alive and well in their head… continuing the destructive verbiage that they don't measure up. These grown adults have lost their true sense of self because their self is intertwined with their parent they grew up with… they are still an extension of their narcissistic parent's fragile ego.


A Narcissist/Perfectionist:

1. Demands nothing less than perfection from others.
2. Is hardest on their spouse.
3. Expects unquestioning compliance.
4. Sees themselves as requiring special treatment.
5. Lives a "my way or the highway" type mentality.

Narcissists are intolerant of imperfection as they believe it reflects poorly on them and others will view them as less than. This is why living with a narcissist is impossible… the spouse takes the brunt of the stress in the relationship… if they aren't "perfect" then it will surely reflect poorly on their narcissistic partner and the narcissist can't have that.


If you are requiring your partner to be perfect… 
there will be marital problems guaranteed. 


The Spouse of a Narcissist: 

You are viewed as an extension of the narcissist's ego
You are viewed as the "blame" for anything going wrong in the relationship
You are viewed as merely a trophy by the narcissist that better not change, get sick or age
You will never be able to get emotionally close to a narcissist
You will never be able to receive a healthy, close and safe love with a narcissist
You will never be able to "criticize" a narcissist even with fair, careful and tactful feedback
You will be devalued and invalidated anytime you try to voice your concerns

So why are they perfectionists?

They had one or two parents that were narcissistic… a parent(s) that made them feel inadequate, insecure, not good enough. Their parent talked down to them… disparaged them, talked to them like they were an idiot… grabbed their shirt collar and screamed how incredibly stupid they were when working on a project… they demeaned them in front of other family members using them as a prime example for others of what not to do… they were held to such extremely high standards… standards no one could meet.


Perfectionists make terrible parents… they pressure their children to be perfect… and if a child feels they cannot live up to the expectations… inevitably they may choose to throw in the towel, figuring what's the point (?!) and rebel instead… leading to poor choices… failing grades, drug use, promiscuity, etc. The best approach parents can take to prevent the development of perfectionism is to have an open dialogue with their children in what they are achieving… to strive for personal excellence, not perfectionism… and that at the end of the day failure/missing the mark, etc never equates to losing a parents love.


If a child brings home a paper with a ninety a perfectionistic parent may say:
 "If you can get a ninety you can get a hundred." 
They always expect more and more. 


As adults perfectionists are often all about productivity… which translates to working all the time; the classic workaholic along with being rigid in their outlook, controlling in their relationships, cheap in their spending and and critical of others. They grow up with you guessed it… a controlling perfectionistic parent(s). Perfectionism is a killer to a relationship, namely a marriage… in that the perfectionist often takes on the authoritative role… they know how to do everything best, won't accept feedback, minimize their own weaknesses and exaggerate the flaws of even the most trivial of their spouse.

"We who are strong ought to bear with the failings
 of the weak and not to please ourselves." 
Romans 15:1

 When it comes to perfectionism one must choose their battles… how the dishwasher is loaded doesn't really matter… how the food and drinks are arranged in the refrigerator aren't a make or break situation… 

 At the end of the day… our marriages must be laced with grace and humbleness to succeed, not a desire of pleasing one's self through the pursuit of perfection. 

 © gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com ~ 2015
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Saturday, January 17, 2015

Everyday Life: When The Toilet Explodes & You Do Too



I rarely write about regular days. The mundane. The typical. The routine.

Usually it's about the biggies, the big topics like divorce, sociopaths, depression, loss and drunk driving, healing and faith… usually it's about something that involves secret pasts that we'd maybe rather forget like soul ties, abortions and running away from home at seventeen.

All that is well and good… very important and affirming to those who can relate and lived through similar life experiences. But what about the everyday? What about the person who is looking for affirmation and knowing they aren't alone in the daily grind of life? What about the mom who is maybe totally over her house that is never seems quite clean enough from crumbs and tiny sticky fingers and finds difficulty seeing the blessings in it? What about the young woman who is spent from working all day and groans at the idea of having to scrub the pots in the sink or wipe down the shower?

Sometimes I myself get so caught up in the big stories, that I forget there is much to share in the little as well… that what I view as little, the daily life that sweeps by moment to moment within the walls of home is actually big as well… because it's so relatable. It's what moms know, it's what all women intimately know and can nod silently to themselves, "Oh, yea, me too."


The other day I had a not so great day. And the reason I share this is because sometimes we look at other moms, other women when were out and about and make assumptions. We look at their carefully curled hair, their immaculate eyeliner, their well-behaved children and think to ourselves: "Wow, she has it together. She is. doing. better. than. me." Which is of course horse poo as we know… but there have been times we've all been susceptible to it, who have entertained and listened to the lies of the devil.


The other day I came home to find two water department trucks parked on my street. I saw the men in their bright neon garb milling around. I had an immediate sense of dread. This has happened before and let me tell you I knew right then it wasn't a good thing. Setting my purse down on the entry table and running in I hurried speedy quick to the bathroom. Once inside I saw what I feared would be there. Dirty toilet water despite the lid having been down had spewed like a fountain all over the bathroom. Dirty water speckled everywhere, my nice linens were wet, my white bath mat was wet, the seat was wet, the gray tiled floor was wet, the glass shower door was wet…  along with the most disgusting rank sewer fumes filling the room. Changing into old clothes and pinning my hair up I began the unwanted and gross job of hauling all the linens to the washing machine, grabbing some cleaner and scrubbing the entire bathroom down from top to bottom until it was shiny clean again. Running the water and flushing the toilet for what felt like an eternity eventually caused the fumes to dissipate. I grumbled, I griped and I curled my lip while I worked. "I come home to this"... "So irritating…" and "What the heck?!" it all traveled through my mind and soon was being uttered from my lips. I was not at my best in my work, in my thoughts nor my words. Who wants to come home after a long day to that?

Not one person. 

I had a little rant-a-thon during my cleaning 

It was later in the evening that I began reflecting. I need some perspective clearly. I was blessed. I had a warm and cozy home. I had a bathroom to clean. I had nice soft linens to wash. I had the things that make a comfortable life.


Like that bathroom sometimes I'm a mess. Sometimes I don't handle things right. Sometimes I gripe and grumble when maybe praise should be coming from my thoughts or lips instead. Sometimes I really miss the mark. Sometimes like that toilet I release things that are ugly or dirty that should stay down. Maybe you do the same thing.


I don't have it all together. I grumble and gripe about stuff that happens like toilets that spew, vehicles that need oil changes and fallen tree limbs that need to be hauled off. I mentally or verbally tsk tsk at stuff that I have no control over but then chastise myself later for the fact I do have control over how I react. This "react thing" gets me a lot and I need plenty of heaping help in it.


And yet in that… I think it's important for us all to realize that there will never be perfection. If that is what we are seeking, myself included there is going to be a whole lotta frustration and disappointment in ourselves and life in general. There is no perfection. The bathroom won't always behave, the toilet won't always keep a lid on it, and yep, every three months that car needs another oil change however irritating we may find that fact of life… we may miss the mark, we may grumble or gripe… but when we feel convicted we can turn to Him, we can admit we are indeed a mess, we can tell Him how much we truly are thankful for what we have and praise Him.


He knows we aren't perfect. He isn't looking for perfect. He's looking for someone who is willing to admit that they don't have it all together and write for others to see that, to write for others who are in a mess as well, who grumble and gripe at the misbehaving toilet but then at themselves for grumbling about said toilet. He's looking for someone who knows they need to share their daily battles in the mundane because somewhere in that mess they are also seeking to find the joys and blessings as well… even if it's long after the task of cleaning up said mess is done. He wants us to share our stories, our realness, our battles whether they are cleaning up dirty water or shedding the dirty sins in our life of yesterday.

Either way no matter how big or small the battle He can use our stories to help others not feel so alone.


© gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com ~ 2015 
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Friday, March 7, 2014

Godly Or Ungodly? Is It Love? 5 Questions To Ask Yourself



October 2012 

names have been omitted in this post 


***************


He sat across from me at the table for two… birds scattered at our feet on the outdoor patio hoping for a bit of food, a tiny morsel to eat. The breeze ruffled my dark hair around my shoulders and on the gray slate table sat a basket of tortilla chips between us and two ice waters. The conversation was non-existent and he munched on his plate of fajita's while I sat in silence watching him. He had chosen the place to eat and I was in no mood to eat at the moment... instead thinking about how his behavior had been increasingly abusive the past few weeks. The restaurant was ensconced among downtown buildings and pretty white lights were lit for a festive feel behind him. It was a lazy sunny Sunday afternoon and we should have been like the other couples nearby… laughing over a late lunch, indulging in our food and connected. But instead I watched him with a stiff back, with a piercing silent gaze… him avoiding my eyes… instead concentrating on the chip he would select from the basket and then chomp on it absentmindedly looking off in the distance at nothingness.


What had happened? Why was it so bad? He had changed. Drastically. Gone was the guy I'd met when we'd dated. Gone was the guy wearing the fleece jacket, boots and driving a truck with glasspacks. Gone was the guy who used to adore me and bragged about me to everyone. Gone was the guy who liked to go country western dancing and gaze at the stars overhead. Gone was the guy who was down to earth and shared my love of chicken fried steak. This guy sitting before me, he was a person I didn't know. This guy liked loafers, designer suits and wine. Which weren't really the issue at hand, admittedly puzzling as that was considering the drastic change... but instead the ego, the image that he wore with it was a huge issue for me, causing me to continually wince and cringe. The truck had been replaced with a Jaguar that I hated, along with an arrogant attitude and a sense of entitlement I hated even more. The once patient, listening and kind facade was increasingly falling away and being replaced with this person who stonewalled, who didn't feel a need to communicate or explain himself, who believed by simply yelling "Jennifer!" he could shut down an entire conversation and walk away. He made me actually begin to dislike my own name because whenever he said it I would cringe. The mean, nasty side had been revealed and his words spoken to me "You look like shit" rang in my head. How had this happened? How can someone change that much? And yet at the time what I didn't realize is that he hadn't really changed. He was always arrogant and behaved entitled… he was just better at hiding it from me once upon a time. That's what changed... his ability to keep it under wraps as he previously had. The more I saw of the ugly side, the more I saw of the true side, the side that occasionally slipped out… the less I liked him, the less I respected him and the less I wanted to face the reality that yes, I was indeed married to him. 


After he paid for the ticket given to him by the waiter we rose and walked out… Once to the car I slid in the gray leather passenger seat and he began driving. There was silence between us and the brick wall was becoming higher by the day. I finally spoke…

"If you had to guess one thing… one thing about you… what would people say is your biggest flaw?" I asked him.

He drove with his hand clasped on the leather steering wheel with a rigid expression on his face… sunlight streaming in from the sunroof overhead glinting off his Dolce & Gabbana sunglasses that had recently replaced his old Oakley's. His profile was set and he didn't flinch. He showed zero hesitation and replied… "I expect perfection of people." His reply was even-toned and matter of fact without a hint of apology.


Perfection. 
Ah, yes. That was it… funny how he knew it and yet made no apology for it... he saw no need for working on it and the truth was his exceedingly high expectation of perfection of others didn't really even begin to touch the surface of the whole picture but merely the tip of the iceberg of all of the dark blemished stinking toxicity underneath. I realized he viewed his expectation of perfection from others as merely a fact about himself, something he believed everyone else needed to work around and accept at their own suffering.


Things were unraveling quicker than you could re-spool thread but I also didn't yet know he was cheating. In that time frame I thought it was all still fixable. I naively believed if we could find someone worth a darn who could help us, who could counsel us we might have a chance at salvaging what was left although I also at the same time questioned just what that was exactly? When you're in these situations as anyone knows who has been there, your objectivity has been virtually stripped and the world you live in is clouded like dirty fogged over contact lenses… you can't see very clearly, navigation is tricky and you just aren't sure what to do.



Questions, Questions and more Questions: 

Does he love me? Does he act like someone who does? The answer was a glaring big fat NO. Did he love who I was? What I stood for? Did he appreciate what I believed in and brought to the table? Did he acknowledge and actually care about what I thought? Another big fat NO. Did he like my traits, my personality, my wit and humor or did he merely look at my outer shell… the superficial package and like how it enhanced his ego, his extension of himself? A big YES to the latter.


Did I like and respect this person who was beside me day in and day out? NO. I liked the person I had been presented years ago but this new person was a stranger, someone I didn't recognize. He wanted someone to idolize him, to accept anything he threw at them and to keep their mouth shut, to never question or reproach him and I wasn't that person. I'm the person who blares my horn at a cop in traffic that cuts me off without lights or a siren on… yes, and I'll do it again… because I have issue with people who abuse their power. I'm the person who will intervene on behalf of seeing a kid being bullied… because it's not right for anyone to be subjected to that behavior and standing by silent is unacceptable as well. I'm the person who will engage the mom who looks like she's about to lose it on her kid in a store with friendly conversation because reprimanding her and shaming her just creates more strife. But he would believe all of that to have zero value… because to place value on those actions means to stand for something good, for something honorable and just… for truth… something someone who is sociopathic cannot even begin to see worth in because their very nature, their very basic thinking is… What is this person's price? Everyone has a price. How much can they be bought for? What can I get off them? What can I get her to do? What are her limits? How far can I go? What can I get away with? This lack of character made me sick to my stomach and yet here I was joined as one to this seemingly sub-human.


Life would be much easier if the people who are sociopaths stuck together and the ones who want to live a life of good moral character had an easier way of seeking each other out. Maybe this is one time we could use labels… when it comes to narcissistic sociopaths and people with loving hearts. 



5 Questions To Ask Yourself If He Really Loves You: 

 1. Does he love you as a person? Or merely as how you make him look to the world? Does he like you better when you aren't questioning him or trying to have a discussion? Do you get the sense he merely wants a robot who just nods and agrees with everything he says?

 2. Do you like who he is now? Sure, at one time you probably liked who he was… we all do when were first with someone. But what about now? If you find yourself recoiling from his CHARACTER… that's a bad sign. If you don't want him near you physically that's another bad sign. 

 3. Is he open to counseling? Is he humble? Is he willing to admit his mistakes? How does he take criticism? Does he bristle and yell or argue or does he discuss it? And in a calm manner?

 4. Are you in a partnership? Or a dictatorship? Pretty self explanatory. 

 5. Do you see any change? This is about spiritual formation. Is he becoming more as Jesus would want him to be or is he becoming more and more like the world? 


© gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com ~ 2014 



To My Readers: 

Thank you for reading, 

sharing and commenting! 

Related Posts:

When Love Isn't Enough & He Doesn't Provide

Standing On A Road She Didn't Plan: A Single Mom Dating

When "Love" = Death: What I Wanted To Tell Her


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Saturday, February 15, 2014

ADHD: Marriage + Compassion & Grace = Love


winter 2013

some names have been changed 

or omitted in this post


**************************



"I still remember the night Jeremy told me he had ADHD..." I told her as I walked the busy park trail with her. The weather had been waffling between thirty degree days and then temps in the sixties or seventies; little spurts of radiating warmth that was incredibly welcoming because of the icy winter season we'd had. Everyone was out... women jogged by with babies in strollers, men ran with their  four legged companions on leashes and kids skateboarded by with their friends. 

As we continued our way along the path... taking in the view of the murky water below that ducks glided across I spoke with a grin "I look back on that night now and see the irony in the situation... he's standing there telling me he has ADHD and I distinctly remember thinking to myself.... 'Oh, that's that thing where you're distracted'... then I was off on the next thought!" I laughed. 

"You never told me this..." She shook her head with amusement "Really? You? Distracted? That doesn't sound like you at all!" She teased me then asked "What on earth distracted you?" 

"Oh, heck... I have no idea! It could have been any number of things! Maybe a bird flew by the window, the air conditioner came on, him.... who knows!" I laughed aloud... "but it's absolutely hilarious to me now because who knew I had it too! I get more entertainment from ADHD related life situations!"

She chuckled at that and nodded, "At least you can see the humor in it!" She acknowledged.  


It's true. 



Seeing The Humor… 

Seeing the humor in our situations in life is one of the most important things we can do whether we have ADHD or not. It keeps us from viewing everything too seriously and humor can often be linked to grace... when we acknowledge, admitting, in humble awareness that we were wrong, handled something incorrectly, or just missed the mark unintentionally in a situation or shared experience... it does something great... it allows you to give yourself likely much needed grace and anyone else that needs it too. 


Missing the mark however unintentionally happens a lot when someone has ADHD. Oftentimes people think we are going around intentionally engaging in less than stellar behavior when we truly aren't doing it on purpose. In fact, it may not even be on our radar. When our non-ADHD spouse asks us to please fetch them a glass of water from the kitchen and an hour later goes by... Hello, Facebook, Pinterest, Yahoo!, etc.... they then believe we must be angry at them for whatever reason or most likely believe us to be uncaring because we can't seem to or don't wish to follow one simple request.... they get grouchy and sulk, complain, gripe, etc and then we feel bad, we feel huge guilt because we know that wasn't our intention. We don't mean to come across as detached at times. We don't mean to come across as not in tune with or uncaring toward the one we married... when in fact people with ADHD are some of the most caring, creative, romantic and passionate people you'll ever meet. So while our spouse is simmering and feeling ignored we begin feeling huge guilt... giving ourselves the internal all too familiar grueling pep talk of "You've gotta try harder! You've gotta stay more in tune! More focused!  More in the moment!" 


Not Being So Hard On Yourself…

Yeah, that's all good maybe if you're on medication but the reality is... sans medication telling yourself "just try harder" may only serve to frustrate you more. It's often more pressure, more expectation and more stress put upon yourself. 


Often people who don't have ADHD can't comprehend why ADHD has such far reaching effects on people in their lives and how on earth something could cause such difficulty. But it truly can and it's capable of inflicting a lot damage to your marriage if you don't both have strategies set in place and most importantly if the non-ADHD spouse is not understanding. A spouse's ADHD can affect everything, even your spouse believing you just don't give a rat's rear about them because you're hyper focused on a project that could be either work related or a hobby.


Hyper! Focus!… 

The person with ADHD often wavers back and forth between being distracted and not in the present moment to the other extreme... hyper focused on something like scrapbooking from 9 p.m. to 2 a.m., leaving your spouse looking at you like some freak of nature as you amazingly assemble a handmade scrapbook for the kids complete with embellishments, captions and photos that would have taken anyone else weeks to months to complete in small increments of time. Then there is the possible risk of your budget being negatively affected if the one with ADHD impulsively spends money that's not figured in the budget or takes extreme risks to their health and safety like on the road or skydiving... all of this and more can add up to the relationship you have with your spouse being not so great. 


The Reminder Relationship…

A partnership between two should ideally stand on equal ground instead of turning into a parent/child or "reminder relationship".... because what happens over time is the non-ADHD spouse begins to feel they must overcompensate or bring to light the ADHDer's potential slack. They feel as though they have to be a walking calendar and alarm system for the person with ADHD... "Did you pick up the so and so?", "When is your next dentist appointment?", "Did you call back so and so?" In turn it gets to be equally incredibly annoying(!) as someone with ADHD when you have someone continually making remarks that only serve to further impress upon you that you're lagging behind on what's on the calendar (sometimes before you've even had the opportunity to forget something) and they are behaving superior. 



*******************


We came upon a point in our beautiful afternoon walk where the sidewalk ended and now the path became rough and uneven... like life often does throwing us for a loop when not expected. 

"I loved being on that Vyvanse for the most part..." I admitted to her "For the first time in my life I got to see what 'normal' or 'typical' is. It was awesome... I got so much done, it was unreal. The biggest drawback was the extreme weight loss which wasn't good. And at the same time I kept feeling like a part of me was missing while on it. ADHD doesn't define me yet is a part of who I am... I'm not real sure where it and I begin or end. It's weird... life is funnier off medication. Being on it life is much more productive but also much more serious. I truly believe one of the biggest factors with dealing with ADHD is having a sense of humor. If you and your spouse can't laugh about it there's trouble. I'm trying new medication to see how I do and yet in that I'm not looking for perfection. Just a bit of help... and whoever I'm with one day is going to have to be understanding... in that if I miss a day or two of medication they aren't threatening me with divorce. If we don't have compassion and grace for each other but instead treat our spouse as an inconvenience how can we ever have love?" 


© gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com ~ 2014 


Thank you for reading,

commenting and sharing! 

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Saturday, May 25, 2013

Imperfections One Day Made Perfect By A Perfect God





Are you living by society's standards or God's standards? Society teaches us to strive for perfection which is unreachable. Likewise we can never reach God's standards on our own, as we must have His guidance and grace. One day when we reach Heaven we will be made perfect but here on earth all we can possibly strive toward is greater holiness than what we were yesterday and greater tomorrow than we are today all the while knowing that Jesus already paid the price for us. An imperfect person attempting to obtain perfection is going to be a miserable one. We are all imperfect and striving to please God and become more Christlike but when we begin limiting our love toward others based on factors such as they are atheists, they look differently, or based on their past, etc... we ultimately lose compassion for people and fail miserably as loving Christians and instead become intolerant ones. Jesus actively sought out people who knew they were imperfect. Those who believed they were perfect didn't have any reason to seek Him because they never saw the issues they had within. Self-pride prevented them from realizing the issues they needed to address to make the necessary changes. God can see us trying despite setbacks and and knows our heart... if we seek to love others, forgive, and give others the same grace we want we will flourish. Seek God and rely on the Holy Spirit to guide you through your journey... only then do we gain grace, power and strength... 
regardless we always have
His perfect love. 
















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Friday, April 26, 2013

The Body Of A Woman: Eating Disorder



Thinness


As women we all want to look nice. We want to look our best and with that we may often sigh about an extra five, ten, fifteen, thirty or plus pounds.


We have all been subjected to unhealthy images of females in magazines and on television, in movies etc. Whether teenage girls or grown women, we know that the pressure today to be thin is huge.


Where does an unhealthy mindset begin?


When we are focused on the...

Scale

Numbers

The word "Diet" 


We can consciously remind ourselves that the word "Diet" is a four letter word and one that shouldn't be used in our vocabulary, homes etc. Women may use it freely but it's a dangerous word to speak and not one we should ever let our daughters hear us say. Studies have shown that the risk of an eating disorder rises in girls who live in a household where other females use the word "diet", talk about food restriction and obsess with the digits on the scale. For some reason in our society today we have been erroneously led to believe that by saying "Ugh, I need to diet! If I can just lose five pounds..." we are being humble and modest. But this is backward thinking and we can replace it with healthy thinking.



It's really difficult to have a healthy view of what we are supposed to eat when we are bombarded daily by ads for bacon cheeseburgers and curly fries alongside glossy photos of polished models who don't look like they've eaten much but lettuce all week. But when we ditch the grocery cart full of cabbage and energy drinks and actually buy a weeks worth of balanced foods that will nourish our body with the protein, calcium and vitamins it needs to stay strong.... we will be nurturing our bodies, not depriving.



Weight monitoring is just that.... monitoring. It's another word for control. It's really attempting to control something...  anything... because we may feel so out of control in other areas of our lives. You don't have to be ashamed of this! Everyone goes through stressful times in their lives and sometimes we may turn to unhealthy ways to manage or control our stress. So we may choose to control our weight. It's dangerous because very quickly we can lose sight of what we truly look like.... our image in the mirror may become inaccurate due to our own distorted mental view of ourselves. In our unhealthy minds we may believe we need to lose weight but the reality is we may be dangerously thin. It's important that as women we monitor our monitoring.... if we find ourselves beginning to judge our bodies with a negative internal dialogue we need to say "Stop." And then pause and review what we are saying to ourselves....




Because if it's not kind, if it's not something you could or would say to one of your girlfriends, then you shouldn't say it to yourself. 


As women we may feel the need to strive for perfection in our weight.... but more than likely the perfectionism is based on society's standards. The sooner we ditch what society believes is right for us the happier we will be and that much sooner we can live an authentic life. 

We can look in the mirror and say:


 "I am blessed with a strong body and no matter what frame, height, etc I am... I am going to strive for my healthiest.... not thinnest!" 


God blessed you with a strong healthy body. He wants you to nourish it each and everyday. He wants you to appreciate your curves and muscles. He wants you to glorify Him. He wants you to care for your body and feed it well...  as we are each wonderfully made by Him. 


I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. 
Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. 
Psalm 139:14
© gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com ~ 2013 


Signs you or a loved one may have an eating disorder:


1. Selective eating
2. Weight loss
3. Obsessed with clothing sizes, numbers on scale
4. Refuses to eat in front of others
5. Always has an excuse to not eat; upset stomach, ill, busy, stressed, not hungry etc
6. Complains of being overweight when in reality not
7. Exercises compulsively
8. Wears baggy clothes to hide weight loss
9. Stops menstruating
10. Feels faint, dizzy, tired
11. Takes laxatives
12. Uses restroom right after eating
13. Shame, low self esteem, depression 


Thank you for reading, commenting and sharing! 




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