Monday, December 22, 2014

20 Signs Of An Abusive Marriage

February 1986 

names have been omitted in this post 


It was around one o'clock in the afternoon he stood at her hospital bed... with bitter disappointment and finally he fled… he left and as the hours crept by… afternoon turned into dusk which turned into night. She sat in her hospital bed with their newborn baby girl swaddled in her arms becoming more and more distraught with worry… where was he? Where had he gone? She began calling everyone she could think of to inquire if they knew of his whereabouts. She called his mother as well, worried he had been in some type of accident. She phoned him at home and at work but her calls went unanswered. The night wore on and with it exhaustion came over her… fraught with worry for him. The next morning he showed up… he admitted he was upset the baby wasn't a boy. Three girls later and he was faced with the reality that he wasn't going to have a son to follow in his footsteps… he wouldn't have a son to continue in the family business… his family name wouldn't continue.


20 Signs Of An Abusive Marriage: 

1. Your spouse doesn't allow you to work and controls your clothes, hair, etc.
2. You're reliant on your spouse for transportation due to his/her control.
3. Your spouse makes you feel insecure by their actions; they leave for periods of time and cause you undue worry over their safety and whereabouts. They threaten suicide.
4. Your spouse is always "checking in" with you via text/phone and or places a gps tracking device on your car.
5. Your spouse isolates you from your family and friends or doesn't put nearly as much effort into forming a rapport with them as you do with his/her family and it causes a strain in your relationship.
6. Your parent passes away (out of state) and your spouse doesn't permit you to travel to attend the funeral.
7. Your spouse blames you when you don't conceive a baby of the gender they wanted.
8. Your spouse hides their mental health family history from you and continues to deflect even after you discover a whole family line of unstable history.
9. Your spouse expects your marriage to completely revolve around his/her family/parents and their home for holidays/celebrations.
10. Your spouse drops you off at home after giving birth to your baby and drives off without so much as a goodbye.
11. Your spouse projects (accuses you of lying/cheating when you haven't), gas-lights (claims you said/did something or denies they said/did something), stone-walls (won't engage/silent treatment), re-writes history (changes the story of what really happened), or blames (never takes personal responsibility) in any way shape or form.
12. Your spouse is verbally hateful or physically hurts you in any way shape or form.
13. Your social life is severely limited or nonexistent.
14. Your children have little social life and complain their home/lives are much different than classmates.
15. Your spouse is a workaholic.
16. Your spouse pressures you to and/or forces you to do sexual acts you don't want to do.
17. Your spouse uses the tactic of intimidation to shut you down; throwing things, hitting/kicking walls, cussing, screaming, stomping through the house, slamming doors, driving off, etc. Driving like a maniac.
18. Your spouse's conversations primarily revolve around him/her.
19. Your spouse doesn't show empathy toward you especially when you're sick.
20. Your spouse limits all your decision making; he/she gives you a paltry amount of money for spending which equates to just groceries, he/she makes all decisions regarding vacations and home repairs/updates… leaving you with no partnership.

© ~ 2014 

The National Domestic Violence Hotline

To My Readers: 

Thank you for reading, 

commenting and sharing! 

Related Posts:

11 Things I Learned From My Childhood

30 Signs: He's Not The One

Love = Upholding Vows In Sickness And In Health 

No comments:

Post a Comment