Tuesday, October 30, 2012

A Craving For Happiness Or Holiness?

image “Cheese Cake” by rakratchada torsap via FreeDigitalPhotos.net 


Everyone wants it.

Everyone places some form or amount of importance on it no matter how big or small.

But what can we do to obtain it?

Happiness doesn't come in a bottle or a box.

I can honestly say there are small indulgences in life that make me pretty happy at least for a moment. Eating a hot glazed donut makes me pretty happy when I'm craving something sweet and sugary. Same for a slice of cheesecake.

But does it last? No. Eventually that last bite comes and I'm left with nothing but that fleeting taste of yumminess. And hopefully not a stomach ache.

The same goes for an affair. An affair is deceptively like a big yummy piece of cheesecake. It may be enticing, it may be wonderfully exciting and it might even make you "happy" for a while. But... it won't last any more than the donut or slice of cheesecake.

The happiness an affair brings like the cheesecake is fleeting and not ever-lasting.

A person who is being unfaithful may be able to justify their actions at least for some time by saying "I just want to be happy."

The same person may even ask themselves "Doesn't God want me to be happy?"

The truth is this isn't about whether God wants you to be happy. God wants each of us to live a holy life. He wants to mold us into His character more and more each day. Even if we have setbacks (which we will) He has a plan for us to help us become a reflection of Him and His word.

We don't have these two doors to choose from in life:

Door 1 - Holiness
Door 2 - Happiness

That's not how it works. Holiness and happiness are not separate things. The truth is, one leads to another.

We don't have to be scared of not being happy and thus choose happiness, then consequently fret over not being holy and living in sin. We don't have to choose holiness yet then be petulant and grieved that we gave up our happiness.

There is an easy answer here for us all:

Holiness leads to Happiness, as when we delight in following Him it gives us great joy.

© gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com ~ 2012 

God, please always guide and mold me 
to be a reflection of your word and live a life 
that will lead me in the plan you have
 for me as I know you love me
and your love for me never fails.

To My Readers: 

Thank you for reading, 

commenting and sharing! 

Thursday, October 18, 2012



Have you ever noticed that the word Convict is in Conviction?

Often times it's very easy to slide into a negative view of conviction. We don't have to feel like a criminal. There is a huge difference between feeling convicted and feeling condemned.

Conviction is a good thing even if at times we struggle with it. It is the Holy Spirit letting us know that we have done something that is not in line with God's word. The Holy Spirit's work is being done in us to instill more conviction and repentance, so we may live in the illumination of God's ever lasting light.

Oftentimes as we grow and change through conviction and repentance in our walk with God our circle of friends change. As we make each step of progress in our walk with God, other's around us may begin to shift uncomfortably and either point fingers of judgment toward us, or step away and eventually move on. Other friends and acquaintances may draw nearer to us as they see us begin to make progress however slowly.

We have no reason to let shame override our being, but merely feel conviction. Being upfront and admitting our sins readily when the Holy Spirit convicts us.

This is the best thing we can do for ourselves. It's truly not the end of the world. Discipling our children is certainly not much different! If we ignored our children's negative behaviors....

Wouldn't they threaten to override the good? We merely TEACH them with gentle correction and guidance back to the right path without condemnation just as we ourselves like to receive.

Years ago I used to think conviction was terrible. I felt shamed instead. I would beat myself up. Internally wring my hands and become very frustrated. But the truth is, it is a very good thing if you are feeling conviction! God wants a fruitful life for you and by convicting you of your negative behaviors (sin) He is letting you know how much.

Rejoice! He loves you that much!

© gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com ~ 2012 

To My Readers: 

Thank you for reading, 

commenting and sharing! 

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Life With ADHD: There Is Help

“Order Or Chaos Directions” by Stuart Miles via FreeDigitalPhotos.net 

Where Are My Glasses?

On my head.

Where are my keys? Where is that paper I needed? 


We all have it to some extent. There are a multitude of distractions during a course of a typical day that can cause us to veer off our intended path. There are our children, our spouses, our co-workers and perhaps a surprise project at work that needs our immediate attention.

But little is discussed about another form of distraction. The smaller forms of distraction that can create absolute havoc and stress if they are experienced on a daily basis. 

Forgetting to load the laundry in the washer. Forgetting to transfer it to the dryer. Not having the jeans or blouse you had intended to wear that day. Ugh, great!

Going to get a glass of water for your spouse and seeing the laptop computer on the kitchen counter. I'll check Facebook super quick. An hour goes by. Wait, did someone want water? Oh yeah. Oops. Again.

Walking outside to throw a bag of trash out and seeing the kids toys everywhere. Taking the time to put those away, then seeing that the hose is a twisted mess. Unraveling the hose. Look at the time! Oh no! I'm late for an appointment! 

One day like this would rattle anyone. Would cause anyone to become frustrated. But imagine EVERY SINGLE DAY being like this. With a million other minuscule moments like those above throwing a wrench in your day. All the while you sit there observing everyone else around you seemingly sailing through life like a swan on a smooth pond absent of ripples. 

Meanwhile.... in your world it's comparable to a frenzied squirrel racing from tree to tree looking for nuts but there are so many trees, so many nuts how on earth does he/she choose which one? And if squirrels had lists, trust me, he/she have forgotten to bring it! 

ADHD is like that. Day in and day out. I lived this way for years and didn't know what the issue was. Imagine everyday being like that and then throw in the feeling of wanting to escape all the time because you are so restless you could swear you have restless leg syndrome. You can try to control it. But where do you begin? The distraction? The impulsiveness? The daydreaming? The constant need to want to flee to the nearest airport? You try to squelch it all as much as you can. Well, that's likely your top choice if:

A. You are married.
B. You wish to stay married. 

And you succeed. To a point. The problem with having to work so incredibly hard to not engage in these behaviors all the time is you can do it in small windows of time around friends and family. But the stress of doing that begins to mount on you. So behind closed doors you may very likely cause your spouse to want to flee. 

Women and girls are less likely to be diagnosed with ADHD than boys. The reason for that is most of society erroneously believes that hyperactivity is the hallmark symptom of ADHD. In boys, this may hold true. But girls are not being diagnosed because they typically present differently. Girls may be quiet, shy, daydreamers in class and have trouble listening. They likely have difficulty keeping their attention on the teacher or task in the classroom. And although hyperactivity may not be an issue girls may be restless. 

There is help. 

Many people don't agree with stimulant use to treat ADHD. There are non-stimulants available. Some people may not feel any medication is an option for them. For me, it was a lifesaver. Truly a God send. It was a day to day saver. Each person has to weigh their options and decide what works best for them. 

Know that if you are struggling with ADHD there are so many others who can relate! It is NOT your fault! You didn't ask for it. It's genetic. If you know someone who has it or suspect you may there is help available. You can contact your general practitioner for help or a local psychiatrist. There is no reason to suffer! And remember, above all, keeping a sense of humor helps.

© gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com ~ 2012

ADD/ADHD resources: 

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Look In The Mirror, Ladies: God Loves You

“Girl Applying Lipstick” by artemisphoto via FreeDigitialPhotos.net 


We all want it.

But where are we looking for it? if you're married it might be your spouse.

If you're single if might be someone you're dating.

You might be looking for love from your father. Daughter's look to their father's for approval, affirmation, and above all acceptance. If they are not accepted by their own father what are they to think?

Our society today is facing a battle of love. It's the battle between father's and their daughters.

Daughters are losing that battle but yet so are their father's.

Father's have the innate ability to set the foundation for their daughter's relationship with God. Much of it depends on their own relationship with God. Daughter's often put their father's on a pedestal and believe how ever their own father presents himself is how God himself is also. It is imperative that father's today don't allow themselves to be viewed as an idol on a pedestal who can do no wrong. Humility in a father will go a very long way in shaping his daughter for the greater good. Admitting when he is wrong and being open with her when he is will help her realize we are all human and humility can override misguided stubborn pride.

This is not a weakness nor will she see it this way. A father who knows the difference between leading in God's love with humility, forgiveness, openness and firmness is the opposite of pride, resentment, non-trust, and control.

I grew up in a home filled with pride, resentment, non-trust and control. It was comparable to living in a prison. I never knew God's example from my father. I didn't know God's love for me until one day watching a sermon on television. I was an adult by then. All I had known during my years growing up was pride, resentment, non-trust, control and being used.

Being told God loved me was so unimaginable to me it took many years to realize the magnitude and truth to it. Unconditional love was so incredibly foreign to me as I had always been loved on conditions and when those conditions weren't met love for me was withdrawn.

But God loves me. He has seen it all. The tears, the suffering, the pain, the disappointment, the anger.

God loves you.

How easy or difficult is it for us to admit that to ourselves?

Your father may have never told you.

Perhaps your father was never there.

But your Godly father loves you more than anything.

His love you don't have to chase.

His love you don't have to appease his ego for.

His love you don't have to hope for.

His love is already there.

Just look in the mirror:

© gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com ~ 2012 

Related Posts:

Women/Beauty & The Comparison Trap 

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Drunk Driving: When "It" Happens ...The Unspeakable Truth

red wine bottle by simon howden via FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Loss Due To A Drunk Driver 

If you've been there you understand.

It's like anything. But if you haven't it's much more difficult...you may feel sympathy and sorrow for a person going through something like this but like anything it can be difficult to fully comprehend what they have endured unless you have yourself.

It's not something that's really talked about much. Even today. Sure you see snips about it on the late breaking news or occasionally a statistic here or there but for the most part it's not discussed.

People in the general public cannot begin to fully grasp what goes on behind closed doors when dealing with it and the tiniest of everyday occurrences that continue to irk you day in and day out.

It's not the alcohol that is the issue.
It's what may happen once an misguided person decides to drive after consuming a drink.

When I go to dinner with someone new it tells me a lot about them by what they order to drink. It tells me even more by what they say when they order something to drink. When I hear "Well, let's see what I want to drink...Hmm, how about a bloody mary? I need to get a few in me to loosen up."

I cringe.

I'm learning so much everyday since I began this journey and what I'm learning continues to surprise me. People in general don't like discussing alcohol. Oh sure, they love discussing the drink menu, the funny moments in the state of a buzz they've had, they love the camaraderie and the laughing till they snort and the nights they never want to forget ...if they can remember them.

But they don't like hearing the sobering truth.

Because it sucks.

It's not fun, it's not laughs and it's not pretty.

The truth is getting a phone call at midnight from your parents. The truth is talking to the officer on the scene of the crash, the truth is going back to bed but not really going back to sleep because your whole mind is literally screaming NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! This cannot be happening. Not to you. Not to your family. It's always "someone else's" family this happens to. Somebody you don't know mentioned on the news. But the truth is there again at 6 a.m. when you have to throw on sweat pants and a jacket and drive to your sister's to tell her the news. The truth is the entire five minute drive there you cuss about how you have to tell her THIS TRUTH and you don't want to do it. Because you are about to change her entire life. And so you cuss and cry the whole way there. You curse God, you curse anyone you can think of for this hell happening.

You even curse your baby sister. For getting in that car.
With a drunk driver.
Because you love her more than anything and would lay down your own life for her.

But she's gone. Just like that.

In an instant a nightmare begins.

And it all started with... "I need a few drinks to loosen up."

© gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com ~ 2012 

Related Posts

An Open Letter To Judge Jean Boyd: 
Ethan Couch, Drunk Driving & Words Of Love To The Families

Drunk Driving: Losing My Sister & Finding Hope In A Dark Place

Monday, October 8, 2012

Image and Aspergers

“Young Child In Nature” by chrisroll via FreeDigitalPhotos.net


When you see that word what thought first comes to mind?

The view others have of you?

That we are all created in God's image?

The word image can have a positive or negative connotation and depending on the individual their view of "Image" may have been shaped by their child hood upbringing and later their adult experiences.

My son was recently diagnosed with Aspergers

Aspergers is a high functioning form of Autism. My husband and I prepared ahead of time to tell our son of his diagnosis. Not only did we want to be prepared but I wanted our son to have materials at his disposal to better understand what Asperger's is. I searched online and much to my relief and delight found books written for children explaining Asperger's. This one was his favorite:


The afternoon we told him, he nodded as if he had already known. I believe he felt relief to finally know why he had felt "different" amongst his peers. He had always been social despite awkward tendencies with it. Now he had a concrete reason as to why he had had these struggles. We read the book together and he excitedly pointed out the boy in the story "Was just like him!" Everyone in the family has read up on Asperger's and the sense of unity and openness has helped bring our family and extended family members closer.

If we hadn't told him we would have set him up for a lifetime of wondering the reason for his struggle combined with the struggle itself. That would have magnified the frustration he already felt! By not telling him of his diagnosis what type of message would we have been sending him?

That when you have a developmental disorder you keep it hidden.
That when you have a developmental disorder you struggle silently behind closed doors.
That when you have a developmental disorder image is more important than authenticity.
That when you have a developmental disorder it's shameful and makes you less than others.

Instead I want to be open with my son. By being upfront and honest with him it empowers him to embrace the struggles he has with social skills and coping during times of frustration thus enabling him to address them along with our encouraging guidance, therapies and prayer.

Knowledge = Power

Once he knows the reason for his struggles they no longer seem so big, so undefinable and he can now receive the validation he needs for all his internal frustration. What a gift that is!

As his parent I don't want to send him the wrong message by letting him think for one minute Image is more important than his truth, his authenticity, his value as a person.

I don't want him believing he doesn't meet this or that image…

but that he was created out of His perfect love.

© gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com ~ 2012