2013 ~ Merry Christmas

Christmas


What is Christmas to you and your family?



For mine…  it's about prayer, fewer gifts and more thankfulness… more quality time spent together…  it's photo books ordered from Snapfish to give to family to commemorate the past year of special moments… it's mugs of hot cocoa steeped with extra marshmallows after building a snowman…  it's cries of glee at Christmas lights lining rooftops…  it's about paper chains strung across the ceiling and hand cut snowflakes on windows… it's about the American Flyer train chugging around the base of the Christmas tree in the background as "Christ whose birth the angels sing…" plays from the stereo in the kitchen… it's about gingerbread houses decorated with small hands and laced with a whole tub of frosting and m&m's… it's about reading the bible together and my children singing "Happy Birthday, Jesus!"… 



Perhaps for your family it's those things too…. maybe it's a time of much loved family traditions passed down through the generations… maybe it's honey baked ham, potatoes and asparagus followed with great grandmother's homemade pecan pie… maybe it's charades, silly antics and a bottle of wine with plenty of laughs to go around… maybe it's a pancake breakfast, fleece pajamas, karaoke and silly Santa hats…  maybe it's about making new traditions as your life changes, as your family changes…



Perhaps it's a time of closeness, of slowing down a bit, wishing you could freeze time…. but instead taking the alternative… a mental snapshot of the sweet scenery around you… of your tiny nephew giggling with anticipation at his first bite of a Christmas sugar cookie, or your grandmother's quiet thankfulness that you thought of her as she sits in the passenger seat beside you and "Home for the holidays…" plays softly from the car radio while out enjoying Christmas lights… maybe it's the glow of the candle warming your daughter's pink hued cheeks as she sings "Hark the Herald Angel's Sing…" in church during the Christmas Eve service…



Or maybe it's about presents and making sure little Johnny has just the right gift under the tree after an endless string of stores, frustrations and navigating congested traffic… maybe it's about popping an Advil because your head is throbbing from too much noise, too much stimulation and one too many drinks just to get through the dreaded family dinner… maybe it's tears coming to your eyes that your loved one is not there to spend Christmas with who has passed on and leaning on God for comfort and strength… maybe it's thankfulness you have a job, thankfulness you just got promoted or just got an interview… maybe it's being grateful for having food on the table despite your circumstances… maybe it's being thankful for good health, beating cancer and good friends…maybe it's about difficulty and growth… maybe it's about change and resilience… maybe it's about cherishing these last few days of 2013 and pressing forward to the new year because yes, better things are ahead…



No matter what Christmas is to you and your family we know who this day is really about:


Jesus Christ


He wasn't born in a mansion, a palace, or a two story home laced in finery and crystal… he was born in humble surroundings… a manger…  a feeding trough was his bed… he was wrapped in worn cloth to keep warm…


He was sent forth by God…  His one and only Son.


Our gift?


It's not under our Christmas trees adorned in ornaments and lights…

It's not brought by Santa dressed in a red suit and pack thrown on his back…

It's not bought at a store filled to the brim with overrated frivolous merchandise…


It's the greatest gift of all…


It's the gift of eternal life. 


© gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com ~ 2013 

To my readers: 

I pray you and your family have
 a very Merry Christmas… 
one of special moments that bring you
 together in prayer and gratitude… 
in closeness and love… 
and that the upcoming year 2014 
brings abundant blessings to you and yours. 

Bless you! 

              To My Readers: 

               Thank you for reading, 

              commenting & sharing! 

Jesus Break My Heart For What Breaks Yours

Love. 


What comes to mind when you think of love?


Oftentimes we tend to think in terms of couples, dating, romance, marriage, and as parents the love we have for our children. Rarely do we perhaps think of Jesus Christ. And yet the truth is, Jesus Christ is the epitome of love and all it's glorious wonder and sacrifice.


Love is bearing nails. 

Love is in his hands. 

Love is Jesus. 


Love is what Jesus did for each and every one of us.

'Cause living He loved me, dying He saved me

And buried He carried my sins far away

Rising He justified freely forever

One day He's coming, oh, glorious day, oh, glorious day...

- Casting Crowns 

 Glorious Day Lyrics

What is so incredibly beautiful about the love Jesus has for us is that it isn't restrictive. His love doesn't pick and choose. His love covers all people… everyone is included despite our world's often limited views as humans… the poor to the middle class to the rich… all races… both sexes… all walks of life receive Christ's love. He has chosen you because "in Christ" there is neither Jew nor Gentile (refer to Galatians 3:28) and no one is left out.

"When he was reviled, he did not revile in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten, but continued entrusting himself to him who judges justly"

 -1 Peter 2:23

When Jesus was suffering, was being treated like a criminal… turn the tables and imagine yourself on the cross… any one of us would be incredibly tempted to lash out, to scream, to curse, to yell, to spit back, to fight… and yet Jesus did not go there… to refrain in absolute firm, secure will. 

 "By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us" 

-1 John 3:16

Because if he hadn't laid down his life where would we be today? The scripture would not have been fulfilled and Jesus would not have been whom he said to be. There has never been nor will there ever be a greater love than Christ's.


When we love others, when we walk in light, when we forgive other's for their transgressions against us, when we try to understand and feel someone's pain that they are enduring (empathy) versus just eliciting a dismissive "Oh, bummer for you!", (sympathy)…  when we share our smile with a stranger… because that one smile just might make the difference between someone who is in the pit of depression, feeling invisible and becoming despondently suicidal instead becoming gloriously hopeful and renewed in spirit…. when we let the person cut in front of us in traffic instead of cutting them off… when we open our hearts, doors and home to someone who maybe doesn't have anyone to spend Christmas with… when we teach our children they do not need the latest and greatest gadget because someone in their same town is going without food and we are called to help those in need… when we choose to not dabble in materialism, idolatry or become "afflicted with affluenza" because the very word "flu" is in it which can lead to death… when we choose to pray for those who have committed the unthinkable, the most detestable things in society because we believe through God, with love, hard hearts can be softened.. when we pray for all humanity… when we act upon all these things and more… we are walking in LOVE.


Today if you could go back in time and stand before Jesus on the cross…

what would you say to him?


What would you feel?

Merely sympathy?

Or empathy?

Would you simply say "Bummer for you!" as you walked by knowing what He did for us? Today do you try to put yourself in his place, imagine what He must have felt? Do you feel moved to tears when you realize the enormity of His suffering and love for us? Would you have knelt before Him and cried for Him as He suffered? Would you have spoken words of love to Him? Would you have sat there all hours into the darkness with him as He cried out to the Lord…

"My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?" 


Empathy is to step out of ourselves and into someone else's experience. 

Jesus was God on earth…  living, experiencing life as we humans do. 

Jesus walked earth touching our humanity in such a way that he empathized with our hurts, our struggles, our mortal-ness if you will, yet living a sinless life. 

When we live our lives trying to understand others and how they feel versus fixing, pointing or judging as they cry out in despair and grief and hurt… when we instead listen, cry with them, hold their hand and feel their pain in our hearts… 


When we pray "Jesus, break my heart for what breaks yours… "


Then we not only empathize…


But we LOVE. 


© gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com ~ 2013 

To My Readers: 

Thank you for reading, 

commenting & sharing! 

The Haters Of The World

"Some people are like pox," she told me and I paused staring at her quizzically.

"Like…  chicken pox?" I asked.

"Yeah, like they are a pox on other people's lives. They spew hate and it spreads like an STD, a disease, a plague and ends up affecting everyone… just by how they treat others."

I thought her description was amusing and interesting although I hadn't likened hate to chicken pox or some other disease that's contagious.



Yet there are indeed haters in the world. 



And haters have the ability to spread their message like wildfire, like dominoes, like a bad cases of untreated herpes overnight… infecting others and creating such huge hate that it threatens to overshadow love like an ugly unclean blanket.



Haters Of Jesus & Christians…

There are the haters of Jesus Christ, the haters of Christians. A vocal outcry of hate towards Christians... ----> who speak of Jesus Christ dying on the cross for our sins has unfortunately led many Christians to hide their faith, to minimize it, to smash it down and keep it tucked away for fear that they will be singled out with hate. As Christians Jesus doesn't want us to condemn others for having different faiths… instead, He would be one who would encourage open dialogue among people, encouraging us to extend love and care anyway. We shouldn't squash our faith but let it shine brightly as we each have a story that led us to Jesus. Luckily in the United States we have freedom of speech and hold the right to speak of our love for the Lord and yet it seems to be an unspoken social rule to not speak of Him or even utter "Merry Christmas". Unfortunately in other parts of the world someone could be openly persecuted or even killed for professing their love for Jesus Christ which is heartbreakingly sad. And yet even with freedom of speech how incredibly dismaying to know we love Jesus so much, that each time we ponder the enormity of what He did for us it brings tears to our eyes and yet to not ever speak of it…. that is unfortunate.



Women Hating Women…

There are women hating other women just because they are fit, thin, wealthy, just because of who their married to, what they drive, what they have…  the list goes on. A woman hating another woman based on her looks, her address, etc is not really hating her but envying her. Jealousy is what is at the core here and yet hate like this is based on ignorance. Why would we believe a woman has it all based on what she drives? This is such misinformed thinking and we must be mindful that the woman driving the relatively new Lexus could be counting dollars in her purse, slices of bread in her pantry and wondering how she's going to feed her children that week… because her newly divorced ex hasn't paid child support and she's still job searching. We need to look past what we see. Looking past the exterior and remembering there is a person with a whole life we know nothing about, that is maybe breaking inside and just getting by… instead of spewing hate based on skewed and wrong assumptions we can all choose to extend kindness instead.



Hate Toward Certain Individuals…

There are the haters of homosexual individuals in communities all over the world. As Christian's we know the bible states that God made man; Adam and then Eve. We know the Lord designed man and woman like He did for a reason, to compliment each other, for companionship and reproduction. We don't have to agree with the views of someone who states they are homosexual. As Christians we don't have to agree with a lot of things in life. There are Christians who break away from the traditional views of marriage and certainly not all Christians spew hate toward individuals who are gay yet it does still unfortunately occur today. Being a Christian we are called to love, not hate and not bully. That's the foundation of being a Christian… knowing Jesus Christ died for us, for our sins and being thankful we have His grace, His mercy although far from perfect… having a heart of giving, one of thankfulness and kindness toward others. When we spew hate at a certain group of people we fail as Christians and misrepresent our Lord.



Hating Someone Based On Color…


There are the haters of people of different colors, haters of interracial marriage, haters of someone being viewed as different based purely on color of skin versus being viewed as a person with feelings, a past, present and future. It doesn't make sense to hate someone based on color. It doesn't make sense to hate an entire race of people merely because you've been wronged by someone white, hispanic, black etc. It would be ludicrous to say: "I hate all Vietnamese people because I was raped by a Vietnamese man." That's complete insanity. And yet people may subscribe to this screwed up mentality when they've been wronged by one person or their ancestors have been many moons ago. Instead we must remember that each time we hate someone based on color we are actually engaging in great harm to all people. God hates sin but not the sinner…. let's agree that we wholeheartedly hate the sins of people (of all colors) but love people. That is such a victory and one we can set an example of each and everyday.



When we are messengers of God's word, when we value what Jesus did for us, when we look past the superficial exterior of someone and instead view them as someone who has had triumphs, struggles, losses, and joys… when we acknowledge they have experienced the lows, highs and in betweens of life…. when we see them as people, people very similar to ourselves, then we can do what God called us to do…


LOVE.

© gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com ~ 2013

To My Readers: 

Thank you for reading, 

commenting and sharing! 

Husbands: Loving God's Daughter

He pursues her. 

He loves her. 

He cherishes her. 

He values her. 

He honors her. 


Whom is He?

God.


As women we begin as babies tucked safely in our mother's wombs and yet God already knows us down to all our fingers and toes. We grow into little girls who love jump rope, hopscotch, dolls and crayons. We blossom into teenagers with our mother's smile in our eyes and a glittering future ahead, ready to take on the world with our evolving selves into womanhood. We become women… independent of anyone but God…. later brides to be, wives…. then maybe mothers and with strong deft hands we drive a car, type a document, clip coupons and change a baby's diaper…. we are strong, capable and yes, first and foremost always God's daughter. We, the little girl at six or seven who stood in the hallway listening to her parents fight behind the bedroom door…. we, the little girl who was kissed on the playground during recess and then cried…. we, the little girl who was called ugly names and shunned but still believed in a world of beauty, where raindrops held glitter, prisms were earrings and everyone treated each other with kindness and respect… and we, the little girl who would not at all be able to picture herself at 30 or beyond but now that she is… she looks back at that little girl… and loves her like a little girl loves a Care Bear with all her might…. and knows that as a woman, as a wife, as a mom, that no one will ever love her as much as God.

God Loves You 

Her husband may love her but he's not the first. The first to love her was the Lord, even long before she was born. A wife is a gift to her husband and let him not forget the value in God's precious gifts from above. When a husband treats his wife as a second class citizen, as lower than he, he is not treating her according to God's word. Jesus loved women…. he loved his mother dearly and he sought the woman at the well showing his character that may not have been popular but was undeniably right.


A husband may think "I'm a good enough husband. I'm not great, but I'm not awful either. I mean, I haven't cheated. I don't go to to bars, get drunk and pick up women."


The commandments God has given us are the basics, the foundation, if you will …. to not sin, to not commit adultery, to not let his family come between he and his wife, and more. Yet today it seems in our culture people want a big ribbon, a trophy or fanfare because they met what they view as the basic requirements for martial success.

Hold up…. not so fast. 


We can strive for not just "good enough" but great in our marriages.

And yet that requires God's help.

This means relying on Him.

Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and

 gave himself for it.

 - Ephesians 5:25  - King James Bible 

A husband who loves his wife as God loves her like a daughter… 

A husband never leaves his wife - he will never threaten, never walk out, he will not ever threaten divorce or speak of it. God would never abandon his daughter. 

A husband is gentle - when a wife is frustrated & unlovable, he still loves and is slow to anger, gentle with his words. God does not condemn but convict with love and teaching.

A husband knows that they are one - he and his wife are a team, they function as one and will not allow anyone to come between them… outsiders, co-workers, family and his mother. God desires three in a marriage, Him, the husband and the wife. 

A husband speaks life - he does not engage in ugly, foul, disparaging talk about his wife to anyone, to other men, or share in their private intimate marital moments. He does not give time to other men who voice this nonsense as he knows this does nothing but bring death. God expects us to produce life. 

************

Love is not a feeling… but a choice that we choose everyday. We are the Lord's daughter and He loves us with mercy when we sin, when we fail, when we stumble, guilty as charged, yet our punishment withheld and instead unmerited grace, favor given by Him. This is the example of love He wishes us to give also and what we should look for in the man we marry. When we choose a Godly man who will in turn be a Godly husband, when we marry a believer who values women as the Lord does… we will be marrying a man with a Godly attitude. A man who won't be resignedly sighing... "But I don't go to the bars or cheat…" A man who doesn't believe in "good enough" but instead Godly. A man who serves, who provides without guilt-tripping his wife that he does. A man who chooses friends that don't view women as merely suppliers of lust, sex and pleasure. A man who will hold your hand in church and sings God's praises as he looks into your eyes with the long haul in his heart. A man who will wipe your tears when your mascara has ruined your face because P.S. I Love You makes you cry like a baby. A man who prays for you when you're sick for no obvious reason and bundles you up, taking you to every specialist in town until he has some darn good answers and won't stop until he does. A man who will hold you when your heart is breaking in a pool of tears after a string of useless evaluations that still doesn't give any explanation for why your son's development is not on target. A man who buys you the pink frosted cupcakes and maxi pads when you're on your period at ten p.m. at night. A man who gives you a back rub without expecting sex because you did five loads of laundry, cared for two children and helped him type his latest project for work…. well, just because. 

Because he loves you. 

And you love him.

JUST AS GOD DOES. 

© gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com ~ 2013 

                         To My Readers: 

                   Thank you for reading, 

                 commenting and sharing! 

When Marriage Equals Prostitution

names have been omitted in this post 

2011

********************

I sat curled on the couch under the cream blanket beside him, toasty warm, my long dark hair around my neck and shoulders like a winter scarf.... my body heat through many long layered tops meeting his own.... the large flat screen flashed ahead of us across the room and take out remnants from dinner were scattered across the brown Pottery Barn coffee table before us.... a late Saturday night dinner had consisted of piping hot soup, oversized loaded baked potatoes and muffins from Jason's Deli.... an indulgent carbohydrate dream for two. 

As the credits from the movie began rolling across the television screen and music swelled he stretched and rose from the cream leather couch. It wasn't long after putting away any leftovers and squaring things away for the night, checking on two children snoozing like contented kittens.... we made the climb together upstairs to the master bedroom. 

Intimacy was initiated and I was hesitant. 

The words "I bought you dinner" came at me with an irritated tone. 

Like this was business. 

Transactional. 

Soon came his verbal release of "I did this...  x,y,z for you..." etc. 

It was attitude.

It was flesh. 

It was "let's make a deal".

It was selfish. 

It was wrong. 

I said words in return I never ever thought I'd say 

and was shocked by them as they snapped from my lips:

"I might as well have stayed with my rapist!" 

He stood there. 

Shocked. 

Angry.

Rage in his eyes.

How dare I. 

"That's right!" I yelled from across the bed at him,

"You do things for me based on the expectation of what you will get! You want to make a deal! You think if you buy me dinner you get sex! I don't want a marriage like that! That expectation! That backward mentality! Marriage is supposed to be about doing nice things for each other because you love them! Selfless! You make me feel like a prostitute! You make me feel dirty! You're my husband! At least with (rapist; name withheld) I knew what to expect! I knew what was expected of me!! I knew the rules! But I married you for love!! To love you! And then you do things for me purely based on getting sex!!" I yelled, then out of complete frustration added.... 

"How do you think that makes me feel?!?!!!!"

 I yelled at him, getting it all out… 

revealing long buried feelings now 

stark naked in all their honest ugliness. 

He stood there watching me…
His face changing from contorted 

scarlet anger to now cool detachment
and amusement, even disdain.

"You are fooling yourself." 
He nearly spat at me…

 "No man does anything just to be nice. 
Women always cost men money whether we date them 
or we marry them. Nothing is ever free." 
He told me with meanness dripping from his tone. 

"No..." I shook my head "I can't believe that. I refuse to believe that!" 

I nearly shrieked at him with absolute certainty and tears pooling in my eyes.  

                  **********************

Intimacy and sex within a marriage...

rests 

on 

the 

husbands 

shoulders

alongside Christ. 

When he's a Godly man and puts Christ first and foremost in the marriage, when he loves selflessly without strings attached and unconditionally as Christ he will be a shining beacon, a safe place for his wife to be with, to walk with, to lay beside and ultimately to revealing her body to without hesitancy but instead with uninhibited trust and joy. 

If he's representing the world with all it's lust and sin and self serving philosophies of "what can I get" or "what can I give" veiled in the malicious agenda of "what can I get".... he is not selflessly loving his wife which later reflects in the marital bed and leads to her feeling used, cheap and tarnished. 

A wife shouldn't be placed in a position where she feels the need to equip herself with a gun and wear an armor vest for protection while telling her husband: 

“Woman And Gun” by Pong via FreeDigitalPhotos.net

"I don't do deals" 

If a man treats his wife as a sex object, as a trophy wife, as a dangling shiny charm of triumph on his arm out of his need for narcissistic supply.... he will pay the price and it won't just be in a monetary fashion. 

She pays the price too. 

He will be paying the price with a wife who gives sex out of dutiful guilt to submit to him not out of free joyous love. It will be a wife who doesn't trust him, doesn't respect him nor feels loved by him because if she can't be loved while on his arm on the street, in the car or in the kitchen why would she believe she could be loved by him undressed before his eyes in the marital bedroom? Of course she can't. So she pulls away, giving less and less in all areas, hence sinning too. He will be met with a divided wall between them, a headache, a shooing him away and if ultimately pressed a reluctant going through the motions by her with arms crossed out of self protection of her wounded heart. 

Is that the picture of love? 

Men, your approach matters. 

Get with God first. 

Then your wife. 

Leave the world behind. 

Let your selfless love shine. 

© gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com ~ 2013 

              To My Readers: 

               Thank you for reading, 

             commenting and sharing!  

Sacrifice: A Man's Love

"We can't expect a man who has an ugly view of women

 to sacrifice for his wife as he will see himself as superior

 to her along with her needs and desires being less-than his." 

Sacrifice....

What could possibly be wrong with sacrifice in a marriage as there is beauty in it.... just like Christ's love for us. Imagine how much more marriage can be with a man who is living by the word of God alongside his wife... two people who are truly committed to one another. How beautiful it is if a husband is encouraging his wife to become everything she can be also... when both individuals feel the freedom of balance and one not being weighted down like a brick while the other experiences the joy of floating. We are meant to be encouragers in life and by supporting each others dreams we build up those we love, not drain and take away leaving little left. 

A Man's Self Vs SACRIFICE... 

Is he willing to sacrifice the comforts of life he desires to provide what you need if necessary? 

Is he willing to sacrifice his life for you?

Is he by your side when you are sick, sacrificing his other pursuits as he knows you are the most important person in his life? 

Is he on your side, are you working together as a team or do you feel as though he is living for himself within the marriage?  

A Man's View Of Women... will affect his view of sacrificing for his wife.

Is he walking in the light and not in the dark ways of the world; the crassness and vulgarity spoken of women? The dirty objectification of women? 

Does he deem women without value and useless to him other than being used for sex? 

Does he see women as invisible after age 30? After age 40? After age 50?

Does he view women as people with actual feelings, thoughts and intelligence or merely a once attractive woman now used, over the hill and riddled with aging imperfections? 

When there are sacrifices extended in purposeful love by each partner in a relationship, in a marriage... this creates a healthy environment where each spouse is encouragingly propelled by the other to pursue their personal goals however large or small. It may not always be perfectly equal (and likely won't be) but if attempts are made so each person feels heard, their dreams valued and encouraged... beautiful things can happen in a marriage as each person grows individually, reaching their own potential, ultimately bringing each of you closer together in communication and love! .... this being an example of a healthy marriage. 

"As women, we may sacrifice nearly to a fault, becoming people pleasers and ultimately becoming dissatisfied and depressed. We need to guard against sacrificing so much that we become a doormat and lose who we are and what we wish for in this life. Teaching our daughters this is essential and that marrying a man who understands and lives the concept that sacrifice should be mutual is vital to her future marriage being a healthy one." 

We can't have light and darkness in our marriage and thus if we marry someone we should share the same beliefs and purposely live the same walk. We may marry someone who sold us a facade of being a follower of God and then once the "I do's" are exchanged and we are behind closed doors come to realize it was all a good talk without action to back it up. 

2 Corinthians 6:14 

Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?

Genuine love is always marked by the hallmark trait of being open, trusting one another, loyalty and giving each spouse the freedom to live authentically. 

Alternatively, unhealthy love is demonstrated by selfishness, disloyalty and love of self... shown by destructive behaviors such as using one's spouse to fuel solely their own ambitions and dreams. Expectations may be placed incredibly high upon the sacrificing spouse that it causes each spouse to become frustrated... eventually the one who continually takes and takes feels his never ending needs and desires still aren't being met... so he seeks additional fulfillment through sins like affairs or addiction.

      God gave us the ultimate sacrifice... 

               His son Jesus Christ. 

When we live boldly, fearlessly, walking in selflessness with each other in our marriages, choosing to marry someone in which we both share living out God's purposeful love through action... we have the opportunity to be a beautiful example to others in their marriages... 

To be sacrificing and encouraging. 

That doesn't have to be merely a dream. 

It can be a beautiful reality. 

© gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com ~ 2013 

                     To My Readers: 

                 Thank you for reading,

               commenting and sharing!