Saturday, January 17, 2015

Everyday Life: When The Toilet Explodes & You Do Too

I rarely write about regular days. The mundane. The typical. The routine.

Usually it's about the biggies, the big topics like divorce, sociopaths, depression, loss and drunk driving, healing and faith… usually it's about something that involves secret pasts that we'd maybe rather forget like soul ties, abortions and running away from home at seventeen.

All that is well and good… very important and affirming to those who can relate and lived through similar life experiences. But what about the everyday? What about the person who is looking for affirmation and knowing they aren't alone in the daily grind of life? What about the mom who is maybe totally over her house that is never seems quite clean enough from crumbs and tiny sticky fingers and finds difficulty seeing the blessings in it? What about the young woman who is spent from working all day and groans at the idea of having to scrub the pots in the sink or wipe down the shower?

Sometimes I myself get so caught up in the big stories, that I forget there is much to share in the little as well… that what I view as little, the daily life that sweeps by moment to moment within the walls of home is actually big as well… because it's so relatable. It's what moms know, it's what all women intimately know and can nod silently to themselves, "Oh, yea, me too."

The other day I had a not so great day. And the reason I share this is because sometimes we look at other moms, other women when were out and about and make assumptions. We look at their carefully curled hair, their immaculate eyeliner, their well-behaved children and think to ourselves: "Wow, she has it together. She is. doing. better. than. me." Which is of course horse poo as we know… but there have been times we've all been susceptible to it, who have entertained and listened to the lies of the devil.

The other day I came home to find two water department trucks parked on my street. I saw the men in their bright neon garb milling around. I had an immediate sense of dread. This has happened before and let me tell you I knew right then it wasn't a good thing. Setting my purse down on the entry table and running in I hurried speedy quick to the bathroom. Once inside I saw what I feared would be there. Dirty toilet water despite the lid having been down had spewed like a fountain all over the bathroom. Dirty water speckled everywhere, my nice linens were wet, my white bath mat was wet, the seat was wet, the gray tiled floor was wet, the glass shower door was wet…  along with the most disgusting rank sewer fumes filling the room. Changing into old clothes and pinning my hair up I began the unwanted and gross job of hauling all the linens to the washing machine, grabbing some cleaner and scrubbing the entire bathroom down from top to bottom until it was shiny clean again. Running the water and flushing the toilet for what felt like an eternity eventually caused the fumes to dissipate. I grumbled, I griped and I curled my lip while I worked. "I come home to this"... "So irritating…" and "What the heck?!" it all traveled through my mind and soon was being uttered from my lips. I was not at my best in my work, in my thoughts nor my words. Who wants to come home after a long day to that?

Not one person. 

I had a little rant-a-thon during my cleaning 

It was later in the evening that I began reflecting. I need some perspective clearly. I was blessed. I had a warm and cozy home. I had a bathroom to clean. I had nice soft linens to wash. I had the things that make a comfortable life.

Like that bathroom sometimes I'm a mess. Sometimes I don't handle things right. Sometimes I gripe and grumble when maybe praise should be coming from my thoughts or lips instead. Sometimes I really miss the mark. Sometimes like that toilet I release things that are ugly or dirty that should stay down. Maybe you do the same thing.

I don't have it all together. I grumble and gripe about stuff that happens like toilets that spew, vehicles that need oil changes and fallen tree limbs that need to be hauled off. I mentally or verbally tsk tsk at stuff that I have no control over but then chastise myself later for the fact I do have control over how I react. This "react thing" gets me a lot and I need plenty of heaping help in it.

And yet in that… I think it's important for us all to realize that there will never be perfection. If that is what we are seeking, myself included there is going to be a whole lotta frustration and disappointment in ourselves and life in general. There is no perfection. The bathroom won't always behave, the toilet won't always keep a lid on it, and yep, every three months that car needs another oil change however irritating we may find that fact of life… we may miss the mark, we may grumble or gripe… but when we feel convicted we can turn to Him, we can admit we are indeed a mess, we can tell Him how much we truly are thankful for what we have and praise Him.

He knows we aren't perfect. He isn't looking for perfect. He's looking for someone who is willing to admit that they don't have it all together and write for others to see that, to write for others who are in a mess as well, who grumble and gripe at the misbehaving toilet but then at themselves for grumbling about said toilet. He's looking for someone who knows they need to share their daily battles in the mundane because somewhere in that mess they are also seeking to find the joys and blessings as well… even if it's long after the task of cleaning up said mess is done. He wants us to share our stories, our realness, our battles whether they are cleaning up dirty water or shedding the dirty sins in our life of yesterday.

Either way no matter how big or small the battle He can use our stories to help others not feel so alone.

© ~ 2015