A Father Impacts His Daughter's View Of God: 5 Tips For Dads

“Approve Reject Computer Keys” by Stuart Miles via FreeDigitalPhotos.net 

Fathers and Daughters

Fathers, do you have any idea the amount of power you play in your daughter's life?

Your power for the positive or negative is huge.

Daughters want to view their fathers as protectors, providers, leaders, 

competent, trustworthy and moral. 

DAUGHTERS SEEK APPROVAL 

AND ACCEPTANCE FROM THEIR DADS

It is imperative that fathers are setting the example that their daughters so desperately need in order to thrive in life… in all areas; emotionally and socially. A father is the first man a girl has in her life so it's incredibly important that she is able to connect well with him, to be capable of trusting him and see him as strong in good values and decision making. There is certainly no relationship more vital than the one that sets the foundation between father and daughter… as it sets the tone for her relationship with all other men in her life… future husband included if she marries.


Can she trust her father? 

Well, that depends… is he making choices that deem him trustworthy? If he's attending church regularly, if he's actively following Christ, if he's leading the family in prayer, if he's taking the time to connect with his children, if he's balancing work with down time, if he's not speeding, not drinking to excess, not lying, etc… if he's making morally sound decisions on a daily basis… she will come to find with time that yes, his actions match his words and he can be trusted. However, if he's practicing road rage, flying off the handle at his family, drinking, cheating, lying, working all the time, being emotionally, verbally and or physically abusive… he will show his daughter bit by bit that he cannot be trusted… that his words are meaningless… that when he speaks everyone might as well drown him out with deaf ears because anything he utters is a lie.

Eventually if he proves over time he is not capable of leadership, of morally sound actions, his daughter will pull away. She won't feel safe. She won't respect him. She will find herself feeling derision toward him each and every time he proves once again he's merely a sham.

******************

March 2015 

names have been omitted in this post 

I set my keys and the warm pizza box on the kitchen counter along with an aluminum foil container.

"Grab a fork and an extra plate and I'll split this Fettuccine Alfredo with you, sweet pea." I told my daughter as I grabbed a stack of white napkins from the wicker basket atop the counter.

"Okay!' She said and scampered to the utensil drawer. I quickly began assembling everything we needed on the wood coffee table in the den including two glasses of water. She pulled up a couple ottomans and after we sat down I opened the pizza box.

"Oh, yum! I want pizza too!" She said and I swiftly set a large cheesy slice of pepperoni pizza on her plate beside her pasta.  "Thank you for dinner, Mommy." She said and added "And thank you for having them add chicken to the fettuccine. It's way yummier."

"Yeah, it is!" I replied with a grin "You're welcome. I love Joe's Pasta and Pizza." I smiled at her. It was the perfect cozy night at home with her, eating Italian to go and spending time together.

As we talked she said "So… guess what? Daddy… he told me that God is not my Daddy."

I stopped mid-chew and looked at her "What?"

"Yeah… I told Daddy that he's my dad and that God is too. But Daddy told me that God is not my dad, just he is." She told me.

Silence. I was getting pretty fed up with having to clean up the messes he continued to make.

A FATHER IMPACTS HOW A CHILD SEES GOD

“Family With Two Children” by Ambro 

via FreeDigitalPhotos.net 

  A GODLY MAN IS HUMBLE AND KNOWS THAT ULTIMATELY GOD IS IN CHARGE. HE IS A LEADER IN THE HOME FOR CHRIST. HE IS BOTH SERVANT AND WARRIOR FOR GOOD ON EARTH.

Finally I spoke "That's not true. God is your Daddy… God is our Heavenly Father. If you're a believer you believe God is your dad and he sent his only son Jesus Christ to earth to die for our sins. God was Christ in the flesh. Daddy is your father but he's your earthly father."

She picked the chicken out of her fettuccine eating it first then starting on the pasta. "Oh… so he lied. Again. Why did he tell me that?" She pondered aloud. "I guess if he doesn't think God is my dad then he thinks he isn't his either." She spun fettuccine on her fork "If he doesn't believe God is our father then maybe he doesn't believe in God at all." She said. I watched the pasta swirl on her small fork and I sighed.

"I don't know." I replied then added "But I do know that you have every right to believe in God and what the bible tells you." I told her.

******************

In John 14:9-10 Jesus said, "Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father. How can you say, ‘Show us the Father’? Don’t you believe that I am in the Father, and that the Father is in me? The words I say to you I do not speak on my own authority. Rather, it is the Father, living in me, who is doing his work."

© gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com ~ 2015

5 Thing's For Father's To Tell Their Daughters:

1. You are wonderfully and fearfully made (Psalm 139:14)
2. You are loved and accepted (Romans 15:7)
3. You are God's daughter (2 Corinthians 6:18)
4. Christ died for you (John 3:16) 
5. Forgiveness and grace are for you and others (2 Corinthians 12:9) 

RELATED POSTS: 

Husbands: Loving God's Daughter

Girl's & Life: Everyday We Have A Choice

How To Be A Good Father: 7 Tips

"Did He Say Ugly?" Teaching Our Daughters That Strength Is Beautiful

Strong 

It's a word we may use to describe someone… maybe their physical strength… maybe their ability to overcome any obstacle, heartache or challenge in their life… despite any roadblocks they press onward with strength and to others perhaps sheer astonishment not just survive but thrive and overcome.

********************

It was a little after three o'clock in the afternoon, I'd picked my daughter up from school  and we were driving to the store to pick up a few essentials we needed… milk, bread and some chocolate syrup… that does count as an essential, right? As I drove along the busy main road passing chain restaurants and big box stores like Sam's I heard a small voice call out from the backseat behind me.

"Daddy always says my hair looks ugly when I don't wear anything in it like a headband." she told me.

My hands gripped the wheel tightly in silent response and almost reflexively I pursed my lips… concentrating on my driving… slowing to a stop at the red light I rolled up the windows to turn on the air and then glanced in the rearview mirror at her sitting in the backseat. Dressed in her white polo shirt and slacks she looked out her window with a troubled expression crossing her little face.



"Did he say 'ugly'?" I asked in a neutral tone… "I mean,  specifically 'ugly'?" I added.

The word "UGLY" spun like a loop in my head and I sat in shock by his words to her. 

"Yes!" she responded with great force and nodded at me. "He says it's ugly when I don't have anything in it."…. then added "I mean… he doesn't even hardly have hair!" she exclaimed with great observation, throwing her hands up in the air... obviously having noticed the irony of the interaction between her and her father… including the difference in hairs on their heads.

With my back to her I couldn't help but silently affirm how true her point was… 

With a deep breath I pressed the gas pedal when the light changed to green. Turning down the volume on the radio slightly I spoke slowly...

"Sweet pea, you are absolutely beautiful. Your hair is beautiful. Your hair is never ugly. Sometimes people use a poor choice of words. I believe this was one of those times. Your hair nor you are ugly. Remember that." I told her.

*********************

It was later that evening we went on a walk… to get outside and enjoy the fresh evening air. It had drizzled earlier and the streets were damp from the rain… occasional drops of water escaped the bright green foliage on the trees overhead and touched down on us like happy drops from Heaven as we walked. Children on bikes and scooters played in their driveways nearby as we passed by calling out hello to them. My daughter took long strides and her ponytail bobbed out from her well loved pink baseball cap. In her small hand she held a mini water bottle and as we strode at a quick pace I spoke…

"You know what?" I asked her.

"What?" she answered back.

"You know what I think is really beautiful? I think strength is beautiful. I believe being physically strong, being strong in what you believe in like morals and God... even humbly but fiercely believing in yourself... can all be seen as beautiful. Being beautiful isn't just about your looks or your hair, you know... or what you have on." I told her as our feet hit the pavement in sync with one another.

"Yep!" she agreed with a bob of her honey brown head and I smiled with affection for her. 

It's true. 

It's imperative that girls today realize how beautiful being strong is. Beautiful isn't just about a pretty face. We as a society tend to place a woman's worth solely based on her beauty... with diets, shape wear and weight loss pills being promoted to women along with photoshop as does the fashion and model industry... women are often being deemed worthy or beautiful based on their waist width and breast size alone. But we know that does women such a disservice. 

From the beginning of time in a little girls life we coo and exclaim how "beautiful" she is... of course she's beautiful... but that's not the entire picture by a long shot. 

She's beautiful when it comes to strength... to pumping weights, to running and breaking a sweat… and  giving birth. She's beautiful when it comes to speaking up, reaching out and spurring change in the world. She's beautiful when she is strong for those who don't have a voice and say what needs to be said even if it's not popular. She's undeniably beautiful when she is pushing herself to the next goal no matter how seemingly unreachable. She's beautiful when she sings the Lord's praises and speaks to Him in thankful gratitude. She's a pillar of beautiful strength when she tells someone God loves them when they've never been told and that they don't for a minute deserve the abuse they've endured. 

A woman of strength holds her own... she is firm when someone attempts to invalidate her experiences. She doesn't accept the refutes regarding what she knows truly happened. She leads others to a place of beauty, of healing, of encouragement and affirmation. She shows strength in leadership and discards doubt when it tries to creep in... she lets go of insecurities and the absurdities in life that crop up... she says "yes" to taking charge and doesn't entertain being called  "bossy" for it. She says "yes" to love and no to fear because where one exists the other rarely if ever can. 

She is clothed in a vest of goodness and yet strikes with fierce determination in all she does. She may stumble occasionally yet she doesn't wallow in the puddles of life but instead leaps back up and keeps going. She gives hope to those who have been hurt, she shares her story to bridge the gap between herself and a stranger... she knows the importance of not just telling her daughter she's strong but that she's beautifully strong... 

Through Christ.

© gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com ~ 2014 

To My Readers: 

Thank you for reading, 

commenting and sharing! 

Related Posts: 

Women/Beauty and The Comparison Trap 

http://gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com/2013/05/womenbeauty-and-comparison-trap.html

Women: Proverbs 31 or Sexy Hot? 

http://gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com/2013/12/women-proverbs-31-or-sexy-hot.html

"Because You're Old Enough To Be My Dad"… Older Men & Younger Women 

http://gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com/2013/09/you-old-enough-to-be-my-dad-older-men.html

50 Things To Teach My Daughter

Fifty Things I Want To Teach My Daughter


1. You are beautiful, inside and out.

2. Your worth is not defined by a man.

3. I love you.

4. Share your thoughts even if your voice shakes.

5. Being a mommy may be your most important job but it shouldn't be your only job.

6. You are never too old for me to hold, brush your hair or laugh with.

7. You can always call me. Any hour. Day or night.

8. You can tell me anything.

9. Sunscreen. Apply liberally each and every day.

10. It's better to have less money and be with a man who adores you than to have deep pockets and be with a man who is indifferent.

11. Travel. While you are young and able.

12. If you talk about a friend behind their back it better be a compliment.

13. God loves your reflection in the mirror, don't bash it with a negative internal dialogue.

14. Take pictures. You will never regret too many. But you will regret too few.

15. Take care of your body. Treat it with care. Exercise.

16. If you marry you are to be your husband's wife, not mother.

17. Trust your instincts. If it feels wrong, off, or uncomfortable... it is.

18. Giving up is easy. To keep going takes courage and strength.

19. There will be times in life you don't know whether to scream, laugh or cry. Don't hold back.

20. Eat. Don't live off salad. Have the burger, the fries and the shake. Then some fruit and veggies.

21. Go to the doctor regularly.

22. Have a good cry. Then stand up, dust yourself off and go again.

23. Goodness doesn't equate to boring. That's a lie of the devil.

24. Asking for help is not a sign of weakness. It's smart.

25. Praying is one of the smartest things you can do.

26. Just because so and so is doing "it" doesn't mean you should. "It" might be something really really stupid. And dangerous.

27. Don't be a "people pleaser". Having conflict doesn't mean you aren't nice. Respectfully stand up for yourself.

28. Laugh at yourself.

29. Being an introvert does not make you less valuable. Being an extrovert does not make you more.

30. You can shoot a basketball, throw a punch, shoot a gun, use a compass. You are fully capable.

31. It's the little things. Sending a friend a text that they make you smile. It means a lot.

32. Use proper grammar and spelling. Both are important.

33. Women in magazines are airbrushed and photoshopped. It's all a facade.

34. Look people in the eye, give a firm handshake and smile.

35. Wit, brains and strength last. Beauty is fleeting. The best compliment a person can give you is "You are a beautiful person inside and out."

36. The "popular" kids in school may very well be at their peak in life. Don't compare.

37. Diamond's are not a girl's best friend. Friends are.

38. Being dirty is okay. Gardening, mud splattered pants, sand covering you, it doesn't matter.

39. Thank God every day for your blessings.

40. Movie stars, models and singers are not role models. God is.

41. Be modest. Have boundaries. The woman who leaves something to the imagination with her clothing is more attractive.

42. Always wear a seatbelt. Stay away from drugs and alcohol.

43. You can be happy without the new shoes, new toy, new dvd.

44. Don't get your navel pierced on your lunch break... think on it first. Then think again.

45. There will be times when life is the equivalent to a pain in the rear.... like a hemorrhoid... deal with it accordingly and then move on.

46. It's not your job to keep people happy. Not even your family.

47. It's not about you. If someone mistreats you it's their own issues they haven't addressed.

48. Don't ever let one person be your everything. It gives them too much power. If anyone is to be your everything it should be God.

49. I'll always be there for you.

50. Just be you.