tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post283964989826333391..comments2023-04-11T07:41:19.630-07:00Comments on GPS-Grace Power Strength: When No One Believes He Is A Narcissistic/Sociopathic PersonGPS-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.comhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13986848807336161254noreply@blogger.comBlogger37125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-85785906954976500362016-08-03T19:25:42.237-07:002016-08-03T19:25:42.237-07:00Thank you for commenting! I'm glad you found i...Thank you for commenting! I'm glad you found it encouraging.. Hugs!! GPS-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13986848807336161254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-60368544271683290812016-08-03T03:23:48.272-07:002016-08-03T03:23:48.272-07:00Oh Chara! My mom was in this exact position! And...Oh Chara! My mom was in this exact position! And as kids, young adults actually, we didn't see it right away either. A counselor helped us to understand and our eyes were opened. My mom (the weakest woman I knew at the time having been married for 25 years) did divorce him. She didn't think she could 'win' either and on some levels, she had to give up on the battle with money and items. But she always says now that you can't put a price on freedom. She's a new woman and it was worth it! girl meets carpenterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12347899455606860327noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-37076957102509300202016-08-03T03:19:35.025-07:002016-08-03T03:19:35.025-07:00I thought for a moment that I had written this!! ...I thought for a moment that I had written this!! This was my dad exactly except for he loved his house and things too much (more than us!) to get physical... but everything else is exactly so! This is so helpful and encouraging! Thank you!!!girl meets carpenterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12347899455606860327noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-1467075612033705102016-07-25T02:49:06.961-07:002016-07-25T02:49:06.961-07:00Yes, I get what you are saying... they hide it wel...Yes, I get what you are saying... they hide it well and maybe on some level we help shield our children from knowing how bad it is while we're in it.. only later they realize.,Winning is a tricky idea with a narcissist... jotting down a list of what you absolutely will not back down on may help ... Plus what are you willing to let go on and not pursue. It's an incredibly tough road with divorcing a narcissist but always worth it in the end... the amount of freedom and peace a person finally has is priceless. You're in my thoughts and I hope it is as smooth and stress free as possible. GPS-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13986848807336161254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-40329370244769754462016-07-24T19:50:58.001-07:002016-07-24T19:50:58.001-07:00I have been separated from my narcissistic husband...I have been separated from my narcissistic husband for a year and half. We were married for 33 years with three kids. The weird thing is that he hid his abuse from them so well that they do not really see what happened to me. Part of it may be, that they didn't notice a lot of it, because it was just normal for them. I also tried to protect them from it and hide it from them. I am terrified of going thru the divorce because I have never gone up against him and won!Charahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02833553061390946574noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-5922140664220561612015-05-24T21:11:40.866-07:002015-05-24T21:11:40.866-07:00You're so welcome! Most people don't belie...You're so welcome! Most people don't believe what really goes on behind closed doors… it's unfathomable to them based on the wonderful facade they have always been presented by the narc. It's amazing the distorted reality the narc can cling to despite those who know them well. GPS-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13986848807336161254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-69160662842417360082015-05-24T15:28:47.938-07:002015-05-24T15:28:47.938-07:00Thank you so much for this posting!! My father wa...Thank you so much for this posting!! My father was/is a narcissist, and this is exactly what I experienced growing up and now (when I run into people who loved and adored him). People would be shocked to know what life has been like for his children. Most do not know that my relationship with my father is practically null and void as a result. He continues to spin a yarn that we are a happy family. Maybe he believes it. Sad.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-13718667198843640402015-05-13T13:36:52.671-07:002015-05-13T13:36:52.671-07:00I'm so sorry this has happened to you. My moth...I'm so sorry this has happened to you. My mother is sixty and your story is just like hers. It's mind boggling to think that everything was a lie but the good thing is that you do get a fresh start and the best is that your relationship with your daughter can be repaired despite his destruction. I completely understand wanting to only be surrounded by healthy people from here out. Bless you and all the best on your fresh start. GPS-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13986848807336161254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-57432633753927100002015-05-13T10:28:04.137-07:002015-05-13T10:28:04.137-07:00I am a 60 year old woman who's n husband of 35...I am a 60 year old woman who's n husband of 35 years just left me for his new gf. I am in shock and had no idea how he's been lying all these years. I found out he's been lying to my daughter for years about me. I never could understand why we didn't get along and it only was revealed to me when she discovered the truth. We had money, a lot I guess, I didn't know. he's blown hundreds of thousands on his women and I've been the frugal one. he always complained I couldn't stay on a budget. Now I know the truth and it's painful to realize how many years I've been the fool. Trying to make the best of a one sided marriage for the sake of my kids. I am grateful to his new gf who let the cat out of the bag so to speak. Why she would want a man who would cheat on his wife and children for so many years is beyond me. She's married too so I guess that makes them "likeminded" I am looking forward the future and having only healthy people around me.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-65146431766522638302015-04-29T08:49:43.718-07:002015-04-29T08:49:43.718-07:00I spent 47 years with one and finally left. Old? ...I spent 47 years with one and finally left. Old? I don't feel old, but what does it matter? I breathe free now. Not only that, but I have reunited with someone I went to high school with who is the exact opposite. So life goes on and it can be fun no matter what your age. You are so right to leave these people whatever your age! Age doesn't matter. My attitude is even if I have only five minutes of life left WITHOUT HIM, it's worth it. Life expectancy today is long and whatever yours is, live it in peace.<br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-20531803860265172912015-04-27T20:39:26.346-07:002015-04-27T20:39:26.346-07:00It's never too late for a fresh start! They ma...It's never too late for a fresh start! They may start a smear campaign (lies) but at the end of the day you know what you've been through and those who truly know you won't believe the lies he spreads. You're on your way to a whole new life! :-) GPS-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13986848807336161254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-42520560530092448272015-04-27T10:40:22.691-07:002015-04-27T10:40:22.691-07:00I was just looking at getting away when he announc...I was just looking at getting away when he announced he was leaving me. I feel guilt, relief, sadness. I know in the end it will be better. It's just the now I'm having trouble traversing. He's spent the last month spreading lies to turn his whole family against me.You folks give me hope and make me realize maybe I'm not the piece of crap he made me out to be. 50 years old and trying to figure out how to restart. :). I know I can do it! Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-71900005879923961032015-04-01T18:50:27.303-07:002015-04-01T18:50:27.303-07:00I'm really glad you pointed that out. I just h...I'm really glad you pointed that out. I just had a talk with my brother about our father and I really got the ¨caught in the middle¨ lack of interest from him. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-82214185737603972782015-03-05T12:59:08.569-08:002015-03-05T12:59:08.569-08:00Hey, thanks for writing... I'm sorry to hear y...Hey, thanks for writing... I'm sorry to hear you've been through this, it's one of the worst things, especially because it is family and we grow up looking to them for protection not just physically but emotionally as well. I agree, we all handle the aftermath of it differently. it's individual how we cope and choose to heal from it. I know personally growing up my dad was big on "don't tell anyone about x,y,z like that I left home, etc because it's embarrassing"... it was done to protect his fragile ego and construct the perfect image he wanted to show others. There is no shame in struggle, in difficulties. We may feel shame and have to find our way to healing whether it takes a few years or many but we are not dirty for what we've been through. In telling others we have a dad who isn't who he claims to be, that we lived a very different life with him than what he exudes we can be authentic and stick to it despite others protests. Is it hard? Oh yeah, I waffled for years, I did the awful dance of acknowledging his evilness and then backing down and glossing it over, desperately wanting to believe differently about him. I now know I'm living an authentic life because I'm no longer waffling. I couldn't go back to subscribing to a life where I tried to ignore or minimize the damage hes done... when we keep silent we may very well be supporting all types of abuse that could otherwise be talked about in a way to bring education and awareness. GPS-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13986848807336161254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-10450325736337505482015-03-05T12:23:16.211-08:002015-03-05T12:23:16.211-08:00Everything you are saying is 100 percent accurate ...Everything you are saying is 100 percent accurate and I've seen it destory people in my families lives. I've struggled a lot personally and made many of the mistakes you mention here. I'm still fink funny it difficult to get out of the cycle Bc it's true no one believes you. Here's the issue I have .... Doesn't it promote violence against women to be silent about the type of person your father is. People rave to me about my father and I tell them point blank he's an awful person. I can't lie about it. What do you think about this. I respect everyone's peronala choice and I don't mean to blame anyone just very concerned that silence on this issue is apart of the problem for women as a whole. Thanks so much for writing bc you didn't have to. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-47879108280287373922015-03-02T10:15:32.361-08:002015-03-02T10:15:32.361-08:00You're welcome, Joe! Thank you for reading!You're welcome, Joe! Thank you for reading! GPS-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13986848807336161254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-81311950767533704652015-03-02T07:18:02.923-08:002015-03-02T07:18:02.923-08:00A very courageous post on a very important topic!
...A very courageous post on a very important topic!<br /><br />Thank you!Joe Potehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00128078440003054702noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-47272639211589193862015-02-28T05:02:25.315-08:002015-02-28T05:02:25.315-08:00Followers instead of friends... you described it p...Followers instead of friends... you described it perfectly.... my dad is the same way, it's similar to people who have been brainwashed into a cult; it continues to make make me sick yet amaze me how one person can hold so much power and get others to do things for them. <br /><br />I totally feel your pain.. I believe breaking free from a narcissistic parent is even harder than trying to break free from a spouse... especially as girls we want to look up to our dads and we expect them to be that strong protective, loving, healthy role model for us. It's really hard when we don't have that. I understand the violating of boundaries, I went through that for years and even though I tried to set them I still wanted his affirmation, his acceptance etc. I'm healthier when Im not around him but I'll always wish things had been different. <br /><br />I'm so relieved you are on the path to healing, to a fresh start. God bless you. GPS-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13986848807336161254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-86537869730146430532015-02-28T02:44:28.763-08:002015-02-28T02:44:28.763-08:00Thanks for the article. I realised halfway throug...Thanks for the article. I realised halfway through that I was holding my breath, and had to consciously make myself breathe... My father is one of those good looking, charming men everyone else loves and thinks is great. He has what I call 'followers' rather than friends. I could never say what he was like to me growing up, or as an adult, because they didn't believe me either. I felt so alone. Then, a couple of years ago, after my only sister died, I ran into her best friend from school (in the 1970s). We were talking about relationships, and parents, and she said, "Your father was so controlling!" I could've hugged her across the table - it was the first time anyone had EVER said that to me.<br /><br />I'm 55 now, and have only just been able to break free of him. He still feels free to violate my boundaries, criticise me, and plays mind games. I felt sick inside while reading your article, but it helped me know I've done the right thing. I simply cannot go on any longer remaining in contact with him - not if I want to be well myself...<br /><br />And, of course, he doesn't believe in God - how can they believe in a power greater than themselves? Impossible! :-)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-39337639972599595742015-02-17T14:23:37.467-08:002015-02-17T14:23:37.467-08:00Oh my. Oh my. Oh my. To think that for so many yea...Oh my. Oh my. Oh my. To think that for so many years, I felt I was the one who lost out and sometimes still do. He was beautiful, charming, and became a huge success in the medical world (world renowned). He would show up/call and then disappear. I lived on eggshells...what did I do wrong? Promises weren't kept. He kept coming back! Someone amazing thinks I'm amazing...what could be better? I sweated every detail about myself..."If I could just...be a little more...something." When we spent time together, he would have an explosive temper. And...the silent treatment.<br /><br />Thank you. I desperately needed to read this and am so ashamed at just how many of my years have been wasted until I am no longer in my youth.<br /><br />I suppose the upside is that there was no marriage (no divorce), no kids (no heartache). <br /><br />My mother was a narcissist. She even told me that a "quack" of a phychiatrist told her this.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-84161043781473334692014-12-24T22:34:16.287-08:002014-12-24T22:34:16.287-08:00So so true... everything you wrote. It goes on so ...So so true... everything you wrote. It goes on so long it's easy to think that there's no escaping it or thinking things can't get better. But they can! You're living proof as so many others. I'm so relieved you escaped and are living your new life. Bless you. GPS-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13986848807336161254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-73692512525857647942014-12-24T20:57:45.775-08:002014-12-24T20:57:45.775-08:00I am 50 yrs young. Was w/a sociopath/narcissistic ...I am 50 yrs young. Was w/a sociopath/narcissistic man for 5 yrs. I just escaped! His anger was unpredictable, if I had do e things better he wouldn't have to get angry. I took very good care of him, yet any time I needed him I would have to ask if he would help me, always had an excuse. He twisted everything, conversations, actions etc to make himself look like he was doing the right thing & that if I just would listen to him & learn, things would be better. Said I didn't appreciate all he did for me, when in reality he didn't do much at all for me, but always found a way to make me feel guilty, not good enough. Well, I caught him cheating 3 months ago. I really loved this man, but something changed in me & I started to see how he would run for his friends when they called, how any activity was what he wanted to do, nothing I ever did was good enough, when all I did was take care of him! In 5 yrs we never had a nice holiday season together. This yr I told myself, if he ruined it again, I was done. So tired of the lies, twisted words etc. He too is seen as a great guy. Will run to help people, be the life of the party etc. All I know is I have too much to offer a real man...& I left! I felt trapped but managed to find a place to live & I can honestly say I am happy! I don't even feel like I knew him. He is a stranger to me.<br />I pray for anyone going thru this. It's emotionally exhausting & they slowly tear you down. Please don't ever lose hope or faith. Get out! We think they will change because they show us that they really love us, make promises to change, but it never lasts. Remember it's not our fault! These people need help but we can't help them & they rarely believe something is wrong w/them. Get out & get healthy! I know it can be tough, in many ways, but you aren't helping yourself by staying! God bless xoAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-26964441656725775402014-12-18T20:48:58.518-08:002014-12-18T20:48:58.518-08:00Wow! Why did I get the chills up my spine readin...Wow! Why did I get the chills up my spine reading your post? It's because I am you in the future. I am going to be 60 this Febuary and have been with dh for over 25 years. I wish I had read this back then, maybe I would have had the nerve to not take him back. Even if I was alone, which I am anyway, it would be a lot better. I just spent 30 days in the hospital almost dying and am still weak and recovering, he showed everyone what a great husband he is to the nurses and anyone who saw him, now that I'm home it's back to the silent treatment, he spends hours on his phone reading porn and playing games with other women, Gee I asked him what happened to all the promises you made to me when I was in the hospital? No answer as always. Things have changed since my near death, I have zero tolerance, I totally dislike him, life is to short and like you I feel how I wasted my youth and I feel really stupid for it, can't get it back and it makes me mad at myself! Hopefully us sharing our situations some young person can spare themselves from a bleak future! take care xxx's Housemousehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09591926265593125339noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-32796354641150112472014-12-07T18:42:58.835-08:002014-12-07T18:42:58.835-08:00Bless you all....
You are very welcome. My hope ...Bless you all.... <br /><br />You are very welcome. My hope for you is strength, peace and a fresh start. GPS-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13986848807336161254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2266837281211217618.post-79124962463205888212014-12-07T18:30:59.438-08:002014-12-07T18:30:59.438-08:00Thank you for writing this. i praye to God for st...Thank you for writing this. i praye to God for strength. This is his first sign.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com